The Holy Spirit came to me when I was young child.  I never understood nor knew if my prayers were being heard or whether they will be answered.  The Holy Spirit came to me in a dream.  Let it make it clear that when I had this dream I was still a young girl probably between 8-10 years. I dreamt of heaven. Heaven then was a place in the clouds. So there I was with my dad and God and we had a travelling bag, I think we just came to visit this beautiful majestic place the sky was clear blue and the clouds as white as snow, the sun beaming on us. I took a bite of the clouds and it made my teeth so cold, because I used to think clouds where just ice formed together as one. That was my first encounter with God in a dream. The best dream I’ve ever had. I still remember it clearly until today.

I never questioned why I had this dream, I never questioned why such beauty was instilled in me, and why I had to be the one to experience it. I just took it and let it be part of my life. In my teachings with spirituality, I’ve always learned to take what serves me and throw out what doesn’t. The Holy Spirit gave me life. And I accepted it, I accepted Jesus Christ as my true saviour. This only means one thing to me and that is pure belief. When I tried to question my dad about religion and putting science with facts, that’s when he made me understand what a belief is.

Being from the 12 Apostles church we have many teachings but from all teachings love conquers them all. And that is the fundamental tool that spiritual being must use. So in Matthew 10. God gave authority to his disciples to go out to the lost sheep to cast out all illness, evil spirits, and heal the sick.  Only those who believe in this power can have the courage, the love, understanding and the trust to do this.

And with that understanding I knew my purpose in life is to teach, to love and serve Gods will accordingly.


The odysseys of my life in the 30’s

Being 30 is such a big deal for me.  When I was younger I didn’t see my life past 28.  I always dreamt of working, having kids and being married at age 25.  None of that happened, except for getting a job, which I am thankful for of course.  Its hard nowadays things are not like before.  Where, you go to school, graduate, get a job, kids and live happily ever after.  No, not in this day, and if it does happen consider yourself one of the lucky ones.  I sometimes laugh when I hear these 20 year olds saying, I want to be married at 25…  God laughs at our plans he really does.

Life has secrets and mysteries and we may wonder how and why things work out for certain people there way they do.  And also trying evaluating why things work out the way they do for ourselves. The way life has changed itself for us, average, female, black and independent.  Our struggles are so similar but yet so different.   The irony is that some are in good jobs but have failing relationships, others are in bad jobs and are providing for their boyfriends, and sad enough sometimes no one is working.  “I’ll be like girl you are doing so well career-wise, why can’t you get a man”? Yes, getting man is not an accomplishment! I know some of you are thinking that, but no man is an island.  Why have all the money, but no-one to share it with, and I’m not talking about sharing it with your mother.

I have had this conversation several times with my peers, while we know comparisons in life are unnecessary, it’s necessary to have these talks.  Not to find a conclusion on whose life is better but to find relevancy in your life on earth. My growth was a bit slow, and if late bloomer is the right word, then that I was.  Everything I did or found was always when everyone had done it.  Drinking, boys, graduation, and work. I did it when everyone was over it, like it’s nothing new.  That was such a big deal though. To be quite honest every time I discovered something new I rebelled, I did it too much. Maybe trying to replace all those lost years.

I am in no perfect relationship either, nor am I in a managerial position where I work, so I too have my struggles and Lord knows I’m trying in all ends, effort at work, and extra hours for the relationship. Two full time jobs is exhausting. Exhausting but fun. And I think that is what the mysteries and secrets of life journeys are. Looking forward to being better.  Having good relationships. Being in good companies with great salaries of course.  You see how I did not put marriage as an option there, not that I don’t want it anymore. I still do. Honestly. But priorities have changed. I guess I just work with what I have and what I can. The rest flows and falls into place like it should.